My Life Is LOTR.

Most people say MLIA. (My life is average/awesome.)
But,
I say My life is LOTR. (Lord of the Rings.)
Do you know why?
Because it is.

Explanation:

• I live in a shire. Okay not really, but it might as well be. People here drink, smoke, and eat too much. So I think that qualifies us as Shire material.
• I portray Frodo Baggins. I mean come on, have you ever seen Elijah Wood? Big Eyes, really attractive. That's me.

Okay, maybe its not a perfect resemblance BUT, the "One Ring" is still in my care. (Or rather Stevens.)

• Samwise Gamgee is my best friend. He always says nice things to me, and never has he ever let my burdens get too heavy. And when I do fall, he is always there to pick me back up. Frodo: "I need you on my side." Sam: "I am on your side, Mr. Frodo." Frodo: "I know you are, Sam." 

You think he looks like this,

But he really looks like this. 

• Occasionally, I transform into more of a Pippin than a Frodo. When thats the case, you'll find me getting into loads of trouble with my twin, Merry. Mischief and Memories are the only thing we make.

The resemblance is astonishing.

And who said they could use one of Ash and I's regular lines in the film?

Pippin: "Anyways, you need people of intelligence on this sort of...mission...quest..thing."

Merry: "Well, that rules you out, Pip."

Side note: It's obvious Ashley is Merry. I'm dimwitted. (And Taller. But then of course "everybody knows Merry's the tall one." Haha ;)

• Aside from my awesome swordsmen skill, I am the soundtrack to all three movies. Don't believe me? Psh. I have hard evidence.

Boom. Bam.

• And lastly, one day I will sail off into the West. Or Perhaps settle comfortably in Rivendell.